Embracing Life

Lou's third hospitalization brought despair, crises of faith, and decisions to be made. The doctors were at a loss. She grew sick from a hospital virus. She had no more easy veins with which to get IVs. She stopped eating. She was too weak to have another major surgery. And, if there was to be another surgery it would be to remove her lung. What to do?

Just before she had gotten sick, we had taken down her crib in preparation for a "big bed." She had no bed in our home. She had been gone for so long at home that it almost felt natural. And with those feelings, I felt as though I was losing faith and that it would somehow impact her. Thank goodness for our minister who helped me through these feelings and for our friends who swooped down and set up a bed.

H began to seriously feel the impact of all this as well. For her, even with lots of attention and gifts, it was clear to her that she was on the sidelines. We added some therapy for her to our routine and we to this day talk and reassure her that she is loved and special too.

The end did come and it was good. After testing and questioning, we decided to allow the doctors to inject glucose into her chest tube which would create such scarring that her lung would be sealed to her pleural cavity for good. It was one of those forever decisions with no going back. We did it. It worked. And after a few days of recovery, we finally went home.





It was Easter.







N and I have cherished and relished life and our family just a bit more fiercely ever since. But it is Lou who shines. She is our dancer. Our optimist. The member of our family who most embraces life at every turn and we embrace it with her.